One of my earliest spanking fantasies, as I first realized it was my butt I wanted to get smacked, was to get one for my birthday. No, not from parents, but from friends. i always imagined them lining up so that, one at a time, they could each give me a pop. It wasn't something we did in my family, and although some of my friends kidded about "birthday spankings," no one actually seemed to get one. I certainly wasn't going to ask for one myself. When I spilled my guts to Jan, though, this was one of the things I told her. And she remembered.
My nineteenth birthday was particularly un-memorable. I was in the dumps. My birthday's in early February - my friends from high school had all headed back to college, leaving me at home. My boyfriend had dumped me months before. I had only started making friends at the community college I attended; I wasn't going to do anything lame like mentioning my birthday as if I needed some attention. Although, of course, I really did. I spent the night itself online doing spanking roleplay, getting half a dozen "virtual" spankings. I was such a loser.
In the year since, my life had turned around. I became good friends with Jan, got my first real spanking, met Nikki, which if you've been reading here, you know turned into a hot and sexy spanking relationship. I came out to my parents and friends, getting total acceptance. I had transferred to a four-year school, living away from home now for the first time ever. I was loving school, making new friends, becoming less shy.
One way or another, my best friends had found out how miserable I had been the previous year, and were determined that my twentieth would be celebrated to excess. It was to be a surprise, of course, so I learned about the planning only after the fact. The primary conspirators, as might be expected, were Nikki, Jan, and my best friend from high school - Beth. As was the case the previous year, my main group of friends were back to school, whereas everyone else was a pretty disjointed lot. Most of the invitees were still under-age, meaning we wouldn't be having the requisite alcoholic beverages for everyone if we went out. So the venue would - once again - be Jan's dad's house. I thought that Nikki and I were going over for a relatively quiet weekend get-together with Jan and Judd - small and intimate, but fun.
When I walked through the door, I was shocked. Everyone I knew was there. Jan and Judd, of course, but also Shane and a couple of the girls from the community college, Hector and his new girlfriend, my cousin Jerry and his girlfriend, a couple people I knew through Jan from my new school, a couple of the girls from Nikki's softball team who we'd hung out with, and then, perhaps most surprising, almost all my closest high school friends. Although they had just got back to school, they had made the trip back home for the weekend. All but Jessica - she was just too far away, but she called - twice! - during the evening to wish me a happy birthday and see how things were going.
We partied hearty - there was music, and dancing, and food, and cake, and drinks, lots of drinks. Jan's dad was away for the weekend, and anybody without a designated driver could crash right there to be safe. Jan had reserved a bedroom for Nikki and me.
The party was just starting to get in full swing when Jan stopped the music and called everyone together. As it was nearing midnight, if we didn't get through "certain festivities" soon, it'd be too late, because it would no long be my birthday. The obvious one was the cake. She lit the candles, everyone sang (if you could call it singing), and I blew them out. Fair enough. But then Jan said they had planned something else for the birthday girl.
Ok, so there's no suspense here for you readers. You know where this is headed. For everyone else (besides Nikki, possibly Judd, and, to a slight extent, me), it was a big surprise. Jan brought out a paddle - my paddle, my souvenir paddle from the jersey Shore, hat had ended up (for some reason!) at Nikki's place, and which was now in Jan's hands. It was time, she said, for Elise's traditional birthday swats - and everyone would get a chance.
Jan pulled a chair into the middle of the room, which she had me bend over, grabbing the seat. She had evidently done her research. I was wearing a short tunic top with leggings, so that when I did bend over, well, let's she say it presented a rather pronounced target.
"You gotta make these count, people," instructed Jan, who then gave my butt a good pop. "Ok, Nikki, you can go first."
"But you already gave me one," I objected.
Jan allowed that it didn't count, being only a demonstration. Nikki hauled off and gave me to give me an even more solid whack. I had taken far harder from her, but this one still got a little yelp. And then everyone else took a turn. Some of the paddlers were rather timid, giving wimpy swats. Others gave more serious whacks. With nearly thirty guests, I ended up with more than several "to grow on" or "be good on." I'm pretty sure a couple people went through the line more than once. By the time I was done, I had a nice sting-y bottom. Not as sore as I was used to, but it still gave me a nice high.
Then the music started up again, and we danced. And drank.
Later that night, I was in the line for the bathroom ahead of my friend Candace. When the person in front of me went in, leaving us alone, in the hall, she leaned close to say, "You like it don't you? I mean, really like it."
As drunk as I was, there was no doubt in my mind what "it" was. Busted! Why should I lie? I nodded.
"I knew it! I was watching your face. Don't worry..." Candace made a zipping-the-lip gesture.
So, my other secret was out, at least to one person, and I didn't care. At least not while I was in full party-mode.
The party went late, til three or four in the morning. Everyone had a good time, just not as good as I did. Later, upstairs , I got another private birthday spanking from Nikki, before we made mad, passionate love.
Judd didn't ask me himself. Jan was the intermediary initially. Although he had worked professionally as a free-lance photographer, he was back in school to get a degree. For his final project in one class his idea was to take pictures of "the female form." Clothed and unclothed. And it seems he was looking for a model.
"What's that got to do with me," I asked as innocently as possible. The answer, of course, was obvious, even to me.
"And he wouldn't ask you?" was my attempt at deflection. That, apparently, had already been discussed. Jan had a dozen reasons why that wasn't a good idea. It would be embarrassing for her, since his family would eventually see the work. Etc, etc.
The truth of the matter is that Jan is a prude. That's what I've concluded. It's like her never wanting to spank me barebottom. But that's ok. She's a great friend.
Anyway, back to the point. Judd was looking for a model, and I was the targeted candidate. Jan and I talked around in circles for a while, until I finally said that he should talk to me himself. So, I was at least considering the proposition.
The next day, Judd did talk to me himself. He put me more at ease than Jan had, by making it seem like it was no big deal. These were not going to be sexy pictures - it was going to be art. We'd start with my clothes on, and go as far as I wanted, stopping if I felt uncomfortable. No "FFN" either. By the time he was done with his spiel I had agreed to do it.
It may be hard for you appreciate how big a thing this was for me. Even a year before I never would have considered taking my clothes off for some guy, whether or not he had a camera. Self-conscious of my shape, I had dressed pretty frumpy all through high school, never showing much skin. Going swimming, I had never worn a bikini until after my senior year, and then only at my boyfriend David's urging. Even now I would almost always wear tights or leggings under a short skirt, and never a low-cut top. Having agreed to Judd's project, I was quite proud of myself for being so bold. It was part of the "new Elise."
Nikki wasn't quite so thrilled. This wasn't long after the incident with Hector, so perhaps that was still on her mind. I assured her that Jan would be there too, and that she, Nikki, would probably be welcome to join us. Nikki said that that wasn't necessary; she trusted me. Whether she did or didn't, I was glad she said it. In my own mind, I was doing it partly for her. It was my intention to frame several of the finished pictures for her as a Christmas present.
I met again with Judd a week or so before the shoot to review everything - procedures, more re-assurances, requests for hair and make-up, selection of the clothes I would wear. We also went over financial arrangements. He thought it only fair that he give me a small modeling fee, as he intended to make prints available for sale in addition to turning in his class project. Because he couldn't afford a large fee, he also offered me a small percentage of the proceeds from any sales. He also assured me that none of the pictures would ever end up on the internet. The last thing he said made me blush - "And Elise, no bruises please." Jan had told him, obviously.
We were shooting in a beautiful old mansion. Judd knew someone, who knew someone, who knew someone who owned it, or perhaps was the realtor. It was for sale, with no one living there, and minimally furnished. It had a grand staircase in a marble-floored foyer, beautiful stone fireplaces, airy bay windows, some with window seats.
Judd had gone there ahead to set up lighting and such. I drove with Jan. When we arrived, she disappeared into the back to the kitchen where she planned to study, but still within earshot "if you need anything."
We got started with me dressed in jeans and a t-shirt.
"Just get comfortable in front of the camera for now, and have fun," were Judd's initial instructions. He was using a digital camera, so he could take an unlimited number of shots without wasting film. He had me pose, and make faces, and climb on the banister of the stairs, or do pretty much anything I wanted to do. Gradually he started giving more direction - how and where to stand, or crouch, or sit; which way to look; the expression I should have. All the while he snapped away, except when he paused to re-adjust the lighting.
I was looking out one of the bay windows with him behind for what must have been silhouette shots, when he said, "Ok. stand there, keep looking out, and take off the shirt. I'm going to stay back here."
I was wearing no bra, as instructed. But I did it, take off my shirt As easy as that. It was only my bare back he could see at first, until he asked me to turn slowly. My little boobies - for they are pretty small - were being photographed, and it seemed natural. Well, ok, I was a little shy about it, but I think that was the look Judd was going for. He shot me from a number of different angles, in different poses.
Then it was time for a break. I put my shirt back on, and joined Jan in the kitchen for a bottle of water. She asked how it was going. I said fine. It really was. After the break, I changed into the dress I had brought along, that Judd had selected. It was blue - a good color for me, he said - knee-length and flowing. Judd poked his head in - time to get back to work.
It didn't feel like work. It was fun. He had me dance from room to room, slowly, twirling, bending. All part of loosening me up again. I felt like a ballerina. I stopped dancing and combed my hair for a series of portrait shots, with a range of expressions. It was back to some more movement, before the time came again to disrobe. For a while my panties stayed on, and then they, too, came off. I stood, I sat, I lay on the floor. Judd's voice as he gave me instructions on posing, was always calm, confident, complimentary and re-assuring.
I had no idea how long I'd been posing when he said, "Ok, Elise. We're all done. " It's odd, but only then did I feel awkward about being naked. This must have been obvious, because he handed me my dress, and then busied himself turning off lights and packing equipment while I covered my nakedness. We'd been shooting for over two hours.
That was early December. By Christmas, I had the pictures in hand that I wanted to frame as presents - a portrait and a full-length shot of me in the blue dress for my parents, and a set of four black-and-white nudes for Nikki. Everyone was happy with their gifts. Judd got an "A" on his class project.
Judd's instructor decided to do a display of the photos from his four top students - in the student center at the college! Judd's was the only one with a nude subject. This was at the beginning of my first semester there after transferring. Judd, apparently decided I didn't need to know this little fact, so imagine my surprise when I came face to face with myself my first week on campus. Funny thing, though - no one else seemed to notice. The pictures were all in black-and-white, with no direct facial shots, and lots of artistic shadows. By the end of the four-week exhibition, I was even taking a perverse pleasure in strolling past the pictures without any of the people viewing them noticing that I was the girl in the photos - and the nudes got more attention than any of the others.
Actually, at least one person did notice. There was this nerdy-looking kid, Peter, in one of my courses that semester. We often sat near each other during class, and would talk occasionally. A week or so after the exhibition had been taken down, he said to me, right out of the blue, "I really enjoyed your pictures, by the way. You're quite beautiful."
I was shocked, to say the least, and a little embarrassed. The way he said it, though, was so earnest, that I didn't think at all that he was being weird. What could I say but "Thank you."
If he secretly wanted to ask me out I don't know, as he never said anything of the kind. We did become friends, though. Eventually he learned that I was in a relationship, with Nikki, so I'm sure that quashed any other ideas he might have had. He did become my tutor for my math class the following fall; I don't think I would have passed without him.
Nikki and I had dated the whole summer without telling anyone - other than Jan, and then Judd - that we were a couple rather than just friends. We realized that this couldn't continue. How can you refrain from holding hands? Around friends and family, that is. Sooner or later you're going to slip. Although "coming out" might be difficult, it wouldn't be so awkward as the alternative.
[Note to readers: I'm backtracking again, a second time, to the end of August that same year. Since lots of things were happening during the same time period, I decided it would be easier telling them topically rather than strictly chronologically. I apologize if it's confusing. So spank me!]
There was the decision, though as what to come out AS. Neither of of was a lesbian. We had both confided to each other that, in the right circumstances, we still "liked boys" (and as my later escapade with Hector would demonstrate for me). Coming out as "bi" might raise still more questions, though. We decided, then, that our "coming out" would simply be as a couple, Elise and Nikki together, and let other people categorize us however they chose.
I would start with my mom and dad. This wouldn't be as hard as it might be for some people. My parents had a number of openly gay friends. We also belonged to what's called an "Open and Affirming" church. one that welcomes gay, lesbian, bi and transexual people. The church didn't have many such members, but had consciously decided to be open to it. Knowing that my dad had been instrumental in that policy choice, I decided he would be the first person I'd tell. Although it was awkward for me to say, he accepted my news even more casually than I dared hope. Every gay person should have such a dad. He assured me that he wanted whatever made me happy - definitely no hand-wringing about "what he did wrong." And he even offered to let me tell him and my mom together as if he were hearing for the first time, which I accepted. My fear wasn't so much that she would he horrified by it, but rather that she'd just have too many questions. My mom was a bit shocked at the revelation, or perhaps I should say unsettled. Without her actually saying it, I somehow got the sense that this killed her plans for my eventual wedding, and her eventual grandkids. She might also ave been a little concerned about what other people might think. Most of all, since she sees herself as being tremendously intuitive, the shock at the unexpectedness of it all led her to question how "true" it was. And, to the extent she was viewing my announcement as meaning that I was a lesbian, she was right.
However shocked my mom was, my parents were never anything other than welcoming. Nikki was invited to dinner on many occasions, including Thanksgiving with the extended family. My dad had a couple one-on-one talks with Nikki. Although neither disclosed to me the details, Nikki simply shrugged them off as the typical father-to-boyfriend sort of talks. My father also invited her to accompany us to church. Somewhat to my surprise, Nikki accepted, becoming almost a semi-regular. That was a bit awkward for me at first, but I have to say, the congregation lived up to its "Open and Affirming" pledge.
Nikki didn't have so much luck with her mom. She didn't expect to. I would end up meeting the woman a number of times, and even having dinner with her and Nikki occasionally. She was polite enough, just not very warm. There would always be a bit of tension there. It felt almost as if I couldn't really breathe again until the visit was over.
My friends at the college weren't so hard to tell, once I decided it wasn't such a big deal. I could have saved myself some trouble if I hadn't been so reticent up through the debacle with Hector. Yes, I eventually told him, and that helped put our friendship back on a better footing.
For most of Nikki's friends it was no big deal at all. They all seemed to be softball teammates, with half of them being lesbian anyway. Nikki said it was better that they did know about our relationship so they wouldn't be hitting on me. It turns out she had already mentioned it to at least one friend who thought I was cute and was asking about my orientation and availability.
The hardest group to tell was my friends from high school, most of whom went back with me to middle school and earlier. That plain, boring, shy Elise who they had all talked about boys and everything else with was now dating a woman would seem like a total disconnect, I was certain. They had all disappeared off to their various colleges, though, postponing things until the holidays, when we'd likely all want to get together. For this task, I needed an ally, and I picked Jessica. Why Jessica? Well, her brother had been openly gay for years, so she would be the one most likely to be sympathetic, or so I reasoned. It proved to be a good choice.
I had invited Jessica and my best high school friend Beth over to my parents during Thanksgiving weekend. I had told Jessica an earlier time, and Beth was always late, so I knew I would have some time alone with Jessica. I brought up my relationship with Nikki as casually as I could. Jessica was enthusiastically giddy at the news. Maybe it was because she'd no longer be the "odd one" with the gay brother, but I don't think it was just that. She was genuinely happy for me. We spent the next half hour comparing notes on her boyfriend and my girlfriend, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. I didn't even get to - or have to - tell Beth when she arrived. Jessica just blurted it out. Beth seemed a bit funny about it at first - she kept asking things like whether I had ever felt attracted to any of our friends, meaning HER I think. It was Jessica who told her to drop it already. By the end of the evening, Beth had loosened up significantly. I think she saw that I was still the same old Elise, which was re-assuring. When we hugged goodnight, she even gave me a playful squeeze of a butt-cheek, giggling afterwards.
Jessica and Beth must have taken care of the rumor mill end of things, because by the time everyone was home for the end-of the semester Christmas break, they all knew. I have to say that they were all pretty accepting. Well, except for one girl whose name I won't even mention. It was pretty clear that she didn't want anything to do with me any more, and certainly not with Nikki when she joined our group for a night out. It can take something like that, I suppose, for you to really know someone, and to find out who your real friends are.
So, I was "out." And it really wasn't that hard, not for me. Other people must have far different experiences, depending a lot on their family and friends. Of course, there was always my other secret. It might be socially acceptable, in some circles at least, to have a same-sex relationship, but to admit you liked getting your bottom smacked - not a few playful slaps, but REALLY whacked - was something that I just couldn't see people understanding. Surely, in some people's minds, THAT must indicate some psychological problem. I could just imagine my friends trying to process that bit of information about plain, boring, shy Elise.
For my first year of college, I had attended the local community college, with the intention of enrolling in a four-year school after completing my second year. Jan suggested that I move up this timetable by applying for admission to the school that she was attending. Although it was theoretically within driving distance, she had even picked out a place for me to live. She and or boyfriend Judd had a room in a house near the college. One of the other girls who lived there would be spending the spring semester abroad. It would mean quitting my part-time job at the diner, and I needed to keep working, especially if I was to take on the added expense of renting a room, however cheap. Jan assured me that there were plenty of employment opportunities in the vicinity - bars and restaurants that would appreciate my experience in the field.
And if that weren't enough to convince me, she pointed out that she'd be close at hand to smack my butt whenever I needed it. If I needed more convincing, she took me over her lap right then for a paddling. She can be very persuasive. Although I had started dating Nikki, things hadn't yet progressed yet (as described in earlier posts) to be getting spanked by her.
I guess I never mentioned Judd before in my blog. Jan's boyfriend was then a would-be photographer. A student at the same school, he had taken a semester off to travel and try some free-lance photography. That was what left Jan with so much time on her hands to spend with me. He had some great experiences, and had taken some great pictures, but hadn't made much money. So he was coming back to school in the fall. He is also a pretty cool guy, who I came to like a lot as a friend.
When I mentioned the idea of changing schools to Nikki, she was all for it. That college and my home were about the same distance from Nikki's place, and she kind of liked the notion that I'd be out from under the watchful eyes of my parents (not that they put any real restrictions on me). She said she'd even consider going back to school herself to take some course there.
So the only people left to ask, or rather tell, were my parents. Although they thought my earlier plan was better, they said they'd be supportive of my decision, if I got accepted, of course.
Right. That. I had to get admitted. I worked diligently on my essay, and took care of all the documentation required to apply. And then I waited.
It was a couple months later, well into the fall semester, that I got notification. I was accepted! Celebrations were in order, and I had several. The best, of course, was my private one with Nikki. By that time I had become quite accustomed to her hand, and other things, on my backside. A long, slow, sensuous spanking comprise a big part of our little celebration.
Everything worked out as planned. I got the room in the house where Nikki lived. It was on the third floor of an old Victorian house. Jan and Judd had the bigger bedroom, while I had the little one. We three shared a bath, and there was a little sitting room at the top of the stairs. All very cozy. The owners were an instructor at the school, and a grad student, who lived there with their toddler. Several other students rented rooms as well. The place had a double kitchen, side by side, with one for the owners, and the other for the roomers to share. I needed a good reference (from Jan and Judd), a lengthy interview and a background check before being accepted. Needless to say, I passed with flying colors.
After the first of the year, I got lots of help moving in - my parents, Jan and Judd, Nikki. I found a waitressing job; it was a higher-class place than the diner, but the people weren't as nice. Oh well, you can't have everything.
Spoiler - Just in case you were wondering, the owners of the house never spanked me or any of the other students living there. I think that sort of thing only happens in fiction. Jan did, however, as promised, though not all that often, as Nikki was primarily handling that duty!
The way I met Hector was rather embarrassing. I was back in school the September after meeting Nikki. The weather was so beautiful that I decided to study outside during the hour between two classes. As I sat reading, somehow one of my notebooks slipped through the back of the bench. I couldn't fit my hand through the slats of the bench, and since there was a huge bush behind, I couldn't just walk around. The only way I could figure out how to reach the notebook was to kneel on the bench, and lean down over the back. Because that would put me in a bit of an unseemly position (well, unseemly except to other spankos), I quickly glanced around to make sure I was alone. Seeing no one, I bent down to reach for the notebook. As I perched there, butt in the air, I heard a loud wolf whistle. By the time I could get myself upright, notebook in hand, this guy had nearly reached me, walking up the path, with a big grin on his face.
"Nice," is all he said.
As quickly as I could, I gathered my stuff, and headed off in the opposite direction, despite the fact it was the other way from my next class. I was still self-conscious about my butt, due to the teasing I had received so many years before from Tommy Tisdale. I still didn't consider it a positive feature that would draw any sort of compliment, even such a crude one.
My escape was temporary. The next day I ran into the guy at the student center. Before I could escape, he introduced himself, and apologized for his "greeting" the day before. He just couldn't help himself, he said. Since he was actually kind of cute, and being so nice, I couldn't refuse his invitation for us to have lunch together. His name was Hector, and he was new at the school that semester. As we talked, he couldn't seem to drop the subject of our first meeting any more than I could stop thinking about it. His explanation was that, being Latino (he was originally from Venezuela), he naturally appreciated an attractive female backside. When I muttered something about its being too big, he assured me that no, it was perfect - so perfect that was it possible I could be Latina myself.
As it happens, and I I admitted, my mother's grandmother had been Cuban, making me one-eighth Latina. Laughing, he said that must explain things. Perhaps it does.
We began seeing each other quite a bit around campus. As it was clear that he had an interest in me, I let him know that I was in a relationship - without telling him that this relationship was with another woman. I wasn't quite ready to be out of the closet. The boundary set, we were able to enjoy each other's company.
Several weeks later, there was an "Octoberfest" dance at the school. Since Nikki was off to visit her mother (and she was no more "out" than I was), I had no other plans. A friend, Shanae, suggested that we check out the dance. Although we had graduated high school together, we only started hanging out together when we started occasionally sharing rides to the community college. Well, we went to the dance, and it was dreadful. The crowd was sparse. the DJ horrid, and it was in the dining hall of the student center. We were deciding whether to go or stay - leaning heavily toward "go" - when who should we see there but Hector. He agreed that the affair was awful, and then invited us to join him at a party he was going to at a friend's house. Since it had to be better than this, we decided to tag along. Shane was driving, and we followed him.
Hector's friend's party was laud and raucous, with lots of alcohol. I don't remember what I was drinking, if I even knew at the time, but it was too much, far too much. Shedding my inhibitions and usual shyness, I was dancing either everyone, though as the night wore on, mostly with Hector, especially the few slow dances. Shanae was getting a bit worried about me, and suggested a couple times that we should be going. At least she told me later that she had; I don't really remember. What I do remember is ending up in a bedroom upstairs with Hector, feeling incredibly horny. I hadn't been with a guy in over a year, and that night, in the state I was in, that was something I craved. Two other things I remember - the sex was mind-blowing ( so much better than what I had ever had with David), and then afterwards, when I went to get dressed, I couldn't find my panties. I think we danced more afterwards, though I can't be sure. Eventually it was Shanae who took me home, though I have no clear recollection of that, either.
Fortunately, the next day was Saturday, because I was too hung over to get out of bed. Though I still felt awful, I was able to pull myself together in time to work my scheduled evening shift at the diner. I canceled Sunday plans with Nikki - having schoolwork to get done, and still not feeling 100%. To tell the truth, I was also feeling a bit guilty. I dodged a couple phone calls from Hector.
I couldn't avoid him on Monday. We had lunch together. He had something to give me - my panties. His friend must have found them, and figured out who they belonged to. If I hadn't felt like a bit of a slut before, now I surely did. I didn't blame Hector - he hadn't forced me to do anything - yet he apologized. He could see I wasn't happy with myself.
I carried the guilt around with me for a couple days, before finally confessing everything to Nikki on the phone. She seemed to take it almost too calmly, though it was clear she was upset. We confirmed our plans to get together Friday night. Well, that was a good sign, I thought.
I met Nikki at her place. However calm she had seemed the night before, she was totally opposite when I got there. It wasn't that she was yelling and screaming, just really agitated, even though we talked around what was on both our minds. If someone didn't do something, it was going to be a miserable evening.
It was in desperation that I said to her, "Maybe you should just spank me."
I don't know what made me suggest this. This may sound funny, but I had never considered getting spanking for discipline. In roleplay, sure, or as a playful (however painful) punishment. But not real discipline for real behavior. I was partly kidding, partly just trying to change the subject, and partly just grasping for anything to make it all better. However I meant it, Nikki must have decided it was the thing to do. It was down with my pants, and then over her lap. She didn't say anything, just used a stout hairbrush on my bottom. It was the hardest spanking I had yet received. That, though, wasn't what hurt the most. What hurt was the anger which with she spanked my butt, and the fear that I might not be able to win back her love. Afterwards, I just crumpled up on the floor and cried. It was a long time, much too long, before she crouched down next to me to engulf me in her arms.
I'm sure that Nikki thought she had given me what I needed. I tried to think so too. After all, a lot of the people I had chatted with online, and a lot of the stories I had read, related how receiving such a punishment helped relieve guilt, and make the recipient feel loved. IN the coming days, I realized, though, that I had felt plenty guilty before the spanking - but that it had not in any way relived those feelings. And it had not made me feel more loved, but rather less. Nikki's hugging me on the floor afterwards was what had made be feel loved. And finally, it had done nothing to steel my resolve to avoid a repeat performance - that was not something I didn't need a spanking for.
Once I realized that I wanted spankings only as erotic play, I needed to be able to communicate that to Nikki - without making her feel she had done anything wrong. After all, I had been the one to suggest it. How was she to know? I screwed up my courage and told her. It turned out that she felt relieved. Spanking me to keep me in line was not something that she wanted to do either. We hopped into bed for some mad passionate lovemaking, without even considering throwing in a spanking.
And that, friends, has been my only truly disciplinary spanking.
My first spanking by Nikki was delicious, despite her being so cautious. I've found that it's not easy for someone who's vanilla to comprehend just how hard to spank, that a spanko not only can take it, but craves it. I'm not saying that I could have taken a really severe paddling back then, because I couldn't. In general, I'm not that great with pain, and it took a long time before my butt developed enough tolerance to take much of a thrashing. I wanted it harder, though, than Nikki had spanked me - I needed to be taken to "the edge." That "edge" would, over time, become further and further out there.
Communication, of course, is the key. I had to be able to say, "yes, that was great. I loved it. But... next time... could you please give a bit more." A little harder, a little longer. It was also important to let her know that I still enjoyed what we had had before, with or without the spanking. I think I did a pretty good job of it. I gradually got her to intensify things a bit, using a variety of implements. She came to understand that I wasn't that fragile, that I wouldn't break if she gave it too me too hard. When she would occasionally (very rarely) crossed my "limit," I might throw out my safe word (or maybe not), and then we'd laugh about it. And sometimes I'd just throw myself on her, without her so much as having touched my butt.
I have to say this about Nikki - never once did she make me feel like a weirdo for loving to get my bottom warmed. She embraced the notion, accepting that it was part of my make-up. Had she been a repressed spanko before, who just needed the opportunity I presented for her to blossom? I don't think so. Although some people say you're either kinky or you're not, I don't think that's always true. Nikki sure accommodated me, exploring along with me. I may be wrong - I don't get the sense, though, that it's ever something she would have done, except to please a partner.
Whatever her innate tendencies, Nikki sure took to the "spanking thing." She'd initiate the action as often as I did, even if it was only because she had learned how excited it got me. She "got" that whispered threats while we were around other people got me going, leading to a hot time when we were alone. She "got" that getting my butt whacked before going out would leave me feeling it, especially if I'd be seated, like in a restaurant, that a hot bot kept me hot for her later.
And we had lots of hot times. We tried different positions - me bending over something, or me lying on the bed - but our favorite was always some variation of "over the knee." I loved being over her lap, where I just seemed to "fit." I'm petite - only 5'3" - with a slight build (other than my butt). She's a couple inches taller, and sturdier (not heavy, just very muscular and athletic). So she was always able to control me when I was in an otk position. That control - being held in place, even if I struggled - was always part of the turn-on.
I "earned" my spankings lots of different ways. Often I'd be sassy, a bit of brat, pushing her buttons until I found myself over her knee. Sometimes, when I was moody, she just decided I needed it. It might be the aforementioned whispered threat while we were out with other people. Or I might just deposit myself over her lap. We experimented with roleplay, like stuff I had done online, but for real - school scenes, or boss/employee stuff. One of our favorites sharing our observations how a character in a movie, or someone on TV, or someone we saw in real life was behaving badly, and then when we were alone, I'd mimic the behavior until she took care of things. That was always good for a laugh, and a good spanking.
I can only imagine whether Nikki was as anxious as I was to have the next conversation, sober, about "what Elise likes." We spoke on the phone, a couple times, but that didn't seem to be the right place or time. We had made some plans to go out ti dinner. The restaurant, though was too crowded to have that kind of intimate conversation. So we had to wait until we were back at her place. Even then, it seemed we were stuck on small talk.
I finally asked a one-word question. "So?"
Nikki made a face - not a bad face, just a face - before replying. "So... is Jan right? Is that what you like?"
I nodded, before adding. "A lot."
However much she had thought about the idea in the intervening days, Nikki still paused as if she still needed to process it. "And it's something you want me to do?"
I nodded again, blushing.
"Then I guess we'll have to try it. Do you want some more wine?"
A little bit of alcohol can really help loosen things up. I hadn't realized it, but I'd already drained my glass.
That might not be exactly how the conversation went, word for word, but it's pretty close. It was a big step for me, getting that information out to a lover. I remember it pretty well.
No, she didn't spank me that night. We did, though, talk about it at length. That was getting to be a pattern with me. I described my fantasies. She asked questions, which I answered. It came a little easier this time - perhaps it was the "dry run" with Jan. We didn't even make love, Nikki and I. Sharing what was on my mind, in my soul, was intimacy enough for one evening.
Two days later on Saturday, we had another date. Neither of us had to say anything. I knew, we both knew, that, before the evening was over, she would give me the spanking I craved. I dressed for it. Although I almost invariably wore pants, on this particular night I wore a miniskirt, with sexy lace panties underneath, panties purchased just for this occasion. Nikki had ordered Chinese, opened a bottle of wine, and lit candles.
We had some wine, although not that much, and barely picked at our food. The tiny kitchen table was too much of an obstacle. We kissed all the way from the kitchen into the bedroom, where she pulled me onto the bed. Although the fondling that followed wasn't enough to get me where I needed to go, it sure was a good start. After some time, there was a pause, as we found ourselves gazing into each others' eyes. The time had come. We both knew it.
Nikki sat up; I crawled over her lap. Her hand rubbed my bottom through my skirt. Then, a bit tentatively, she began swatting me. Before long, my skirt was up, and a bit later, my panties down, as she slapped harder. Compared to ones I would receive later, the spanking was pretty tame stuff. My bottom was tingling, though - perhaps from a combination of both the smacks and the excitement. Nikki's hands roamed, here and there, between, and in. The rest of my clothes came off, as did hers, as we pleasured each other's bodies.
The occasion didn't disappoint. It was far better than losing my virginity, with David - hurried fumbling on the couch in his living room before his parents would arrive home. Better than the much appreciated but chaste first spanking I had received from Jan. Better even than my first time with a woman, with Nikki, just a couple months before. What I had dreamed about for years had finally come true.
Having made it to bed together, Nikki and I started seeing a lot of each other. When Jan would inquire into how her matchmaking had worked, I confided more than a few details. Not that it was all sex. We had a number of memorable dates that were just a lot of fund without (or should I say before) hopping into bed - a Melissa Etheridge concert, a Renaissance Faire (costumed as Robin Hood and the Sheriff of Nottingham) , a three-day camping trip. We had a good time no matter what we did.
In late August, we were at Jan's place to cool off with a dip in her dad's pool. Chased indoors by a thunderstorm, the three of us were relaxing, sharing a couple bottles of wine in the basement rec room (where interesting things always seem to happen). A usually buttoned-down Jan was feeling no pain.
"Nikki," she said, "has our Elise told you yet what she likes?"
Nikki looked puzzled, and mumbled something on the order of, "Uh, yeah, I guess. Lots of things."
"No, I mean what she REALLY LIKES. You know."
Of course Nikki didn't know, because I hadn't yet figured out how to tell her. Of course, with the amount of wine I'd consumed, I wasn't quite wrapping my mind around what Jan was saying either.
A playfully-exasperated Jan announced, "Well, I guess I'll just have to show you."
With that she pulled me over her lap, there on the sofa where she'd spanked me several times before. She proceeded to give me a pretty good hand-spanking, turning my initial laughing objections into squeals, all with Nikki watching. It was funny, embarrassing, and a bit painful all in one.
Nikki and I didn't talk about it that night. It was hard for me to say out loud, "Yes, Jan is right - I do enjoy it." Perhaps. though, it was obvious. I was a little too drunk to worry too awful much, at the time, what Nikki might think.
The next day it did bother me, at least up until we talked. On the phone, it was more what wasn't said that made me more comfortable, since we didn't really discuss it much. It wasn't until we saw each other next that she asked me about it, and I acknowledged that Jan was telling the truth. We talked - not nearly so much as Jan and I had that first time, several months before - but enough that I could tell her about my fetish, and enough for her to grasp, on some level at least, what I was saying. No, she didn't spank me herself then. That didn't happen until our next date.
I never came out and told Jan that I was sexually attracted to women. It probably wasn't hard ot figure out, though, once I had told her, first, about my fantasy of being spanked by a woman, and second, I considered erotic. That was why (as she told me later) she decided to use a bit of subterfuge in setting me up with her friend Nikki. Nikki and Jan were teammates on a recreational woman's softball team. Jan know about Nikki's bi-sexuality because Nikki had once made a pass at her. And I've explained how she knew about me. When she decided we might like each other, her challenge became how to get us together without being overly obvious about it.
Step one was inviting me to a get-together with several of the women from the team. I went, having a good time. Although I can't say that I was especially drawn to Nikki, we did talk some and got along pretty well. A week or so later it was an invitation to go to an outdoor concert, "along with Nikki - you remember one of the girls from the team?" Enjoying the time I was spending with Jan, of course I said yes. While I was driving to the designated rendezvous spot, I got a call from Jan. She needed to take her dad to the doctor, but she'd try to meet up with Nikki and me later. Of course, she never did.
Jan's plan worked, as well as she could have hoped. We had a great time, the two of us, all afternoon at the concert, and then the evening. We both figured out, independently, Jan's little ploy, and didn't hold it against her one bit. Knowing that she must know something about the other made it easier to give way to the growing attraction. By the time we said good night, we shared a kiss, having made plans to catch a movie a couple days later. The movie date went equally well, leading to plans to cook dinner together at her place the upcoming Saturday.
I was giddy with anticipation for what the weekend promised. On Saturday morning, though, that the plans were canceled. A couple return calls connected me only to her voicemail, with no reply. I was devastated. All day Saturday, and then Sunday, I waited, hearing nothing. Desperate, I called Jan. I hadn't yet filled her in on the events thus far with Nikki, but now I did. Perhaps I was looking for too much, or too quickly, and spooked Nikki. Jan heard me out, and promised to do some reconnoitering on my behalf.
She left me a message while I was working the next day, and I called her back on my break. What had happened was this: a friend of Nikki's - her ex-boyfriend, in fact, who she had remained friends with -
had died in an automobile accident, a drunk driver slamming into his car. Nikki was an emotional wreck, in no mood even to talk to me. She had assured Jan, though, that she still wanted to see me again after she was through this.
I felt like a complete, self-centered fool because of how I had reacted, not that I could have known. Jan suggested I stop by her place after work to have a glass of wine to help wind down. I needed more than that, but Jan already knew that.
Was it guilt, or feeling stupid, or being anxious? Maybe a combination of all these and more. Dr. Jan's prescription was a trip over her lap, something I didn't contest. The ping pong paddle did its job well. I was crying by the time she was not - not that it hurt any more than the previous time so much as I was sad for Nikki, and happy that I had such a good friend in Jan.
Nikki did call me several days later. We did did get together at her place to cook. And afterwards we had some really hot sex.
My first spanking by Jan was great. The second one was even better. The dialogue about my desires that began even before she offered the first time continued afterwards. Those discussions were important - even she had never spanked me, being able to bare my soul, so to speak, and have someone react with support and understanding felt so incredibly good. Fortunately, it hadn't ended there.
She knew, then, I craved something a but more intense than that first handspanking. The scene was the same, a couple weeks later, in the basement rec room at her father's house. I remember that we were both done with school for the term, so it must have been some time in May. We were just hanging out, when I picked up one of the paddles from the ping pong table to inspect in, and gave my own butt a couple playful whacks.
Then she said something like, "You know, Elise, if you wanted to try it for real, I could help you with that."
So for a second time, I found myself over Jan';s lap, there on the same couch. In case there was any doubt, I learned that a paddle can hurt a heck of a lot more than a hand. And in this case, Jan made sure that it did. To her credit, she kept going, even when I became a bit squirmy and vocal. Now that was a spanking. No, it wasn't barebottom, but it still hurt pretty good. She was impressed that I could take it so hard, or at least so she said. Afterwards, I excused myself to go off to the bathroom, where I checked things out. Unlike before, I had some serious color.
Since that time, Jan has given me more than a few spankings over the years. Usually, but not always, it's been during times when I've not been getting my butt smacked by someone else. Although she knows full well that I like it having my bottom bared, that's never happened with Jan. We haven't exactly talked about it, but I think it's because that's outside her comfort zone. I couple times on my panties when I was wearing a skirt, and once on a (wet!) swimsuit were as close as she ever came.
And no, we never did anything sexual - no making out or anything. Unlike me, she's quite straight. She would, though, be instrumental in getting me hooked up with, and then spanked by, my next romantic partner, But that's another story.
What Jan did become for me is my best friend. How could she not, when i tell her pretty much everything as I had (not, until much later, though, that I had had a crush on her), and when I could rely on her to give me a good spanking when I needed it most? Jumping ahead a few years,, I was in her wedding when she got married, and she's going to be my own matron of honor. And it all started because she invited me over her lap.